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Saturday, September 21, 2013

Highlights Upgrade

So, I recently started a Highlights High 5 subscription for my daughter.

She loves it.

They have an orange cat in EVERY issue.

And the stories are short, and mostly good (though I have a beef to pick about the freakin' Spanish serial in it- or rather an ENHANCEMENT.  Why not leave the lines blank and let the parents fill it in with the language of THEIR CHOICE!?!  Americans almost spoke German, YOU KNOW!  LOST BY ONE VOTE IN THE CONTINENTAL CONGRESS!)

Ok, so, for the most part, Highlights High 5 is a good magazine.

But this last issue, they have a little book to tear out and assemble entitled "The Place for Cat".

It's, naturally, starring an orange cat.

You'd think it would be a cut little story about a cat and a kid.

But it's not.

Here's the original dialog:

The Place for Cat 
(notice incorrect capitalization in the title)

No, cat, don't do that!
That's not the place for you!
No, cat, don't do that!
That's not the place for you!
No, cat, don't do that!
That's not the place for you!
No, cat, don't do that!
That's not the place for you!
'Come here, cat.
Sit on my lap.
That's the place for you!


Now, besides the SEVERAL grammatical errors in this "story", I have to really complain about the content.  If I were a cat, I certainly wouldn't be wanting to cuddle up with someone who is always yelling "No" at me.

What kind of messed up message is that!?

Here's my suggested rewrite.

Yes, scribble out the original story and put this in it's place (notice, this grammar is correct).

The Place For Cat 

My cat likes to play with this and that.
Then, I hug him and put him back on the mat.
My cat likes to stretch his paws on the chair.
So instead, I pick him up like a teddy bear.
My cat likes to chew my tasty shoes.
And play hide and seek- I see you!
My cat likes to help me put things away.
Then, he gets a toy with which to play.
But the thing I like best about my cat,
Is that he fits right in my lap.


Much more positive message, don't you think?

Obviously, the original was written by a cat hater.


1 comment:

  1. You should submit your story to Highlights. It is fantastic and very positive.

    ReplyDelete